Wow.. its been soo long since i blogged last time.. please send me suggestions if you guys are reading, so that i can improve myself and at the least be presentable, so i wont look like some snob!! :p anyhow.. since the last time i blogged, there has been significant improvement and also other changes in my life.. i have  understood many new things.. like adults are also little girls and boys at their heart, but have cloaked their this side of personality, for reasons they know best.. i mean, i can understand if they are worried about their kids or dependents not taking them seriously if they aren't serious themselves.. but is the solution to it, being grumpy all the time?? lets take my dad's example.. i went to meet him after almost an year and a half.. and its the first time i bought him something with my own saved up money.. and instead of saying thank you, he started lecturing me on how i should save my money and how its a waste of time to gift him something on his birthday.. and also, till this day, i can confidently say that i haven't seen him laugh more than 7 times... and the funny thing is, it is not only my father, but many adults who do this... isn't life about living and finding happiness in the small things?? isn't that how we live and find hope in living that one day, somehow, we will be lifted to a new world order, where everyone cares about the other and not only about themselves and their furtherance in life?? agreed its a herculean task for a human in today's world to even think of another person without any selfish interest, but isn't that hope for??  i believe it is. i believe that without hope and happiness in the smaller gestures of our lives, the world will be a very depressing place to live in.. no one can be perfect.. no one is.. if one person is 98% good at something, he ,may suck at another thing.. we have a lot of different examples of that in this world of ours.. from Gandhi to Hitler to Einstein.. there are many more examples to it.. i find being happy in smaller day to day insignificant matters help me have a very healthy mindset.. the most important accompaniment to it is, not to care about how people gossip about you.. because if they know you, they will never gossip, they don;t know you, they don't know you enough to judge.. now, i know its a very cliched line, but its the truth... don't you think, maybe that's why, its a cliche?? 

the thoughts which always bothered me...

I thought, to become a successful author, I have to address current hot social issues. So for that, I was hunting a social issue that will appeal me, because, after all I am the one who has to write isn’t it? So that’s how I started writing. My friends always told me that I have wisdom (which I always laugh of), so I decided to write a book. But then, on what topic? That was something which was haunting me since the time I started thinking about writing. Then I understood that any person, who wants to tell people what they feel through writing should open up their heart and write, it doesn’t matter if it’s a story, novel, news article or just some thoughts as I am doing… all it matters is that there will be someone who reads what one writes..

I have always thought a lot about many emotions that is around me.. like love, hatred, passion, idleness, attitude etc etc… Of this love made me think a lot. I mean isn’t that one thing that is the root cause of everything else existing in this world?? Positive or negative??I definitely feel it is. Because when love is there as usual it starts as a positive thing, but gradually it starts to assert itself in any relationship in this world and slowly it gives way to negative emotions. Like the first brothers Cain and Abel, they both started on good terms loving each other, but slowly Cain started to love the idea of God loving him more than Abel but in reality God was more pleased with Abel as he was a better devotee a better son to The Almighty. So even unknowing to Cain, Jealousy crept into their relationship, which can be interpreted as a negative emotion, and it eventually lead to Cain killing his own Brother and also the first killing in the history of mankind. I need not remind you of the destruction the love for power has created in this very world we are living. Numerous empires have fallen because of men’s greed which again takes root in love. Love for lust, women, money, power, even love for hatred towards somebody has destroyed and are destroying this world part by part, crumb by crumb. By saying this, I believe that each human every one of them, is to grow beyond that and be matured enough to know where things can go out of control. Because when people are not matured it is not the inner emotion one shows to the people but the insecure outer shell that defines each one of us. Yes, it is the outer shell that defines us.